WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
