I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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