Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
