Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
