I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
