The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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