IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
