I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
