just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
