hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
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