I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
