I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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