Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
