Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize