i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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