dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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