Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize
