White coat. Heels.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
