i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Randomize
