You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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