it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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