it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize