hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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