He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize