How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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