I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
