i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
