I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
