It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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