then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Randomize
