The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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