the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Randomize
