Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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