im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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