Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I need a beard to bite.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
