It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
