She said her name was "party"
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
