that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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