found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
