We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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