therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
