I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Randomize