We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
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