This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Randomize
