then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
