yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
