Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
