i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
