We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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