So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
You ruined the universe
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
