Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
he fucked my hip out of place.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
